Work In World

September 29, 2010 § Leave a comment

Every now and again I like to make a fool of myself, so I get up before the ass-crack of dawn, drag myself to the gym, and pretend I know how to lift things… weights specifically.  All of the lifting machines are relatively new and come with little illustrations telling me the correct order of operations so I take comfort in knowing I can create the illusion that I am a lifter of weight.

So this morning, I was using a weight machine that is supposed to work whatever muscles surround your shoulder blades. As a result, the machine makes you swing your arms in such a way that would suggest you are attempting to fly. I was sitting there preparing to take flight and bouncing around to Kanye’s New Workout Plan when someone begins to hover. And then the hoverer begins to pace. And then he begins to circle. And then, mid-flight, he asks “Can I work-in?”

Irritated, I had to scan my mental dictionary for “work-in” and when nothing came up I turned to him and asked, “work in what?” He said, “your machine- are you done using your machine?” To which I replied, “No! I have 10 more… ” 10 more what? Swings? Swooshes? Reps? Sets? Oh crap, was I supposed to be counting?

What really gets me was all of the time this guy wasted when he could have been working a different machine. I mean it’s 5:30 in the morning, no one is lining up for a spot on any of these benches. In fact there were no more than 7 people on the entire establishment- including the staff!

I bring this up because valuable lessons were learned this morning. I have learned that there is language specific to weight lifting and I should probably learn some of it if I am going to continue being a lifter of the weight.  And I have learned that concrete-sequential, equipment stealing, hoverers are not to be tolerated. Go “work-in” someplace else buck-o!


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